Up & down. Up & down.
I have not been like this, well in...ever. If you read my blog, please bare with me. I won't be like this forever. I promise. Blue sky is coming!
One day I am okay, getting things done, the next I am depressed and not getting ANYTHING done.
I know these emotions are caused by circumstances, and hormones. I totally sympathize with people who struggle with depression. You really don't understand it unless you've felt it. The only time I have really been depressed is when I had "Baby Blues". I was so sad and weepy even though I just had a baby! Made no sense, it was my hormones!! But reading God's word, and time healed that.
You know what is awesome though? Jesus knows how we feel. He was homesick and missed His Father. He was depressed, lonely, and cried a lot. Imagine the loneliness He felt when He took the whole worlds sin upon Him and His Father had to turn away from Him. He had it worse than any of us. He wants to comfort us and for us to tell Him how we feel. I am ashamed to say that a lot of the time I don't turn to Him, instead I yell at the boys, get mad at my husband for being so busy with work, then I sulk for hours.
I was reading a missionary wife's book, and boy did I feel like a brat after. I am thankful to be in the USA, to have a great house, job, and family. So thankful for my marriage, I love my husband so much and he puts up with all my ups & downs even though he is thoroughly confused by them. I am thankful my kids are healthy, happy, and that I get to be their Mommy. I am thankful my kids love me know matter what. Even if I don't get dressed all day or brush my hair.
I am thankful for God and His will for us!! I am thankful He loves me despite all my flaws. I am thankful for my life, and that this life doesn't have to be a sad, miserable life, that God can bring us out and show us true joy.
Cody turned two on the 9th! We went to Chuck E. Cheese just us four. It was awesome.
I love my God, my life, my marriage, and my kids!!
P.S. God is so good. Someone donated a ton of gym equipment to the boys ranch and guess where it's going to be stored?? mi casa. Si senorita. Yay!! Praying a nice treadmill and spin bike come. But I have NO idea, it could be all weight equipment, and old. We'll see :)
Love, The Curvy Housewife