Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Um, why am I still fat?

Sometime last night I realized...it's been almost 3 years since I started on this weight loss "journey". {I'm going to stop calling it that because really it's a life style..} I can say that now my husband, children and I ARE much healthier and make normal healthy everyday decisions. Like to not buy donuts on a regular basis. For example.

Ok so, maybe I was always on a weight loss quest since I was a toddler. {yes it's true. My dad was a professional body builder when I was little and "we" always counted our calories and worked out. I wanted to be just like him!}. I've told you all before how I'd wake up before kindergarten and do Denise Austin's aerobics on the TV. #90sgirlsrule

Even all through high school I would try to lose weight even though I was a whopping 140 pounds. My biggest complaint yet one of my best features were my legs. They've always been big & muscular "gymnast" legs. But I always had cellulite right below my butt on my thighs and I detested them. I felt like I was the only "fat" cheerleader out there. (not true).
Anyways..... let's take a quick look back over the last almost 3 years and see.....
July 2009~ two months postpartum after having Cody, our 2nd son. Starting weight: 244 lbs. (ohmyguacamole).
May 2010~ found out we were pregnant, very excited.
July 2010~ lost our sweet baby 12 weeks 6 days pregnant. weight:208 lbs.
Feb 6 2011~ ran first 1/2 marathon at 187 pounds
April 4 2011~ found out we were pregnant with Reece!! on our drive to Tennessee. Very excited. weight: 193 pounds (don't ask me how I remember all my weights).
June 2011~ 4 months pregnant. weight 184 lbs, lowest weight since before my first son Shane. (I was so sick from gallstones).
July 2011~ Had surgery, so much better, eating again, not sick, happy pregnant lady.
December 5 2011~ went into labor, weight: 228 lbs
December 8 2011~ weight: 214 lbs
April 2012, week before Easter, weight: 204.4 lowest since giving birth to Reece
Monday after Easter 2012, weight: 209 pounds. (who gains 5 pounds in one weekend?)
Today, April 17 2012, after the Easter festivities and a week of hard work on WW, weight: 205.9

Feeewwww that was hard to write. It's hard to read too. I feel like after almost 3 years I should have been at my goal looonnngggg ago. Granted I was pregnant for about a year of that time, but still.

I am TIRED OF IT. If I would have not went crazy Easter weekend and gained 5 pounds I would be down even more probably. And yes even if I lose slowly, although frustrating, I will NOT quit!

I am loving Weight Watchers. I lost about 3 pounds this week. I still feel like that's not enough since I was 204.4. I want to get under that. I want to get under 200...AGAIN.

I will tell you another secret. My brother in law is getting married July 7, (to the sweetest girl btw) and some friends from high school are going to be there. Now, I really don't care about what these people think of me, but let me explain....I saw some of them at my heaviest weight after Cody. So. Very. Embarrassing. For them to remember me as a 140 lb cheerleader senior year, than 6 years later see me when I am home visiting 100 pounds heavier...that's just unacceptable.

I know I won't be at goal by then...but I want to work hard to see how far I can come in that time. Can I also just say that I have an amazing husband that has supported me and stuck by me through all this and I feel like HE deserves to be seen with a healthy wife. Not one that's let herself go. I want him to be like...."BOOYA old peeps. Look at my smokin' wife. Yeah. She's with me." Ya know?

Once again, I want to tell all you wonderful readers (and I do love you all and thank you all for commenting!! They mean so much!) that I AM COMMITTED.

OK. End of Rant. Thanks for reading!

Love, The Curvy Housewife


I'm My Favorite said...

I'm sure many of us can relate to what you're going through. YOU CAN DO IT! The hardest part is getting restarted and sticking with it long enough to SEE results. That was always my problem - giving up before I gave myself a chance. It wasn't until I lost my first 15 pounds and I started to notice a difference in my clothes. Once I lost 20 pounds people started noticing and that was so so so motivating.

I'm right with you. Heaviest weight was 245 in 2010. I'm down 50 pounds but have been stuck in the 190s for the past year. I'm in limbo until I can get it all together and start losing consistently again.

I know we can do it though!

Kelly said...

Adrienne, I've always thought you were a hot mama! It is so hard to push the reset button, and I speak from experience. It will happen, just keep on trucking! Love you. :-)

Adrienne said...

Thank you both so much! :) You are both right! Kelly you;ve motivated me!

Life as a Convert (Khourt) said...

Being committed is the first step and I think your goal of being able to say "Ive lost my weight" to those highschool people is a very motivating goal. Heres my confession: I see people that I went to school with and they have gained weight. I secretly get happy inside because its those people who I looked at in school and wanted to have their body so much. Now, I know we all have struggles, some just come later than others.

Liz is getting back to her fighting weight said...

Being Committed is a great thing! I think you are amazing! All the work you have put into it. Having 2 babies does alot to your body. I think you should do nothing but congratulate yourself on all your hard work!

Katie said...

I can *SO* relate to this entry! Thank you for being so raw and honest! It's helpful to "hear" that other people are in similar spots in their life!

Kimberlynn said...

I feel the same way...only I haven't been pregnant during any of this. LOL

In my opinion (not that it matters really), I think you're beautiful and doing a fabulous job. You're changing your life and habits, and even more importantly, you haven't given up no matter how hard things have been. So pat yourself on the back for a job well done!

Love, hugs and blessings sweet friend!!!

Katie A. said...

Girl hang in there! I know it can be frustrating when you're trying to lose weight and the scale isn't changing like you want it to be, but you're still doing a great job! Don't forget that muscles weighs more than fat, so as you build muscle the scale may stay the same or even go up, BUT muscle burns more calories than fat. You will get there, it just takes time unfortunately. The weight didn't get put on over night and it's not going to come off over night, but you ARE committed and you WILL get there! Maybe it would do you some good to quit stressing over the numbers for a couple of weeks and just enjoy your workouts?