Maniac

You know how my husband calls me a maniac because I get on these manias? Yeah well that's where I've been all week.
Once I realize something is a great idea and I'm passionate about it... it consumes me until I feel like I have control over it. This happens with losing weight & racing.
Right now it's my photography. Something clicked a couple weeks ago and I realized...I want to focus on newborn and baby photography! I LOVE everything babies, birth, and bellies. You know this about me.
So.....I've spent all week making a "studio" in my house, buying cheap props, making cheap props, doing a photo shoot, then downloading free trial of Photoshop and totally frying my brain trying to figure it out. This photo took me a good few hours.....


All while still managing a household and keeping 3 kids alive. Fewww.

The Lord is REALLY blessing. I have already had one paying photo shoot the above baby girl :)
I have one tomorrow and two in Morgan Hill this weekend (my sister in law had her baby! We are going to see her and I am doing her photos on Friday for free of course). I am charging very cheap right now, I need to build my portfolio. There is still so much to do: change my website from weddings to babies (I will still do weddings but that will be later). Get a logo, and most importantly O R G A N I Z E.

Since my mind has been so busy, I have not put losing weight as a priority this week. Honestly I don't even want to eat I am so busy, so I through whatever is fast together. I need to be organized! A time to edit, a time to clean, a time to play with my boys, a time to cook and prepare healthy food and a time to exercise! This I am working on...

Weigh In, well I was the same as last week. Which is ok I guess, at least I didn't gain. Next week.....weight loss is TOP priority. I am going to make good decisions while out of town this weekend...I WILL.

Love, The Curvy Housewife

Mania

These last few days have been very emotional, stressful, frustrating, and confusing days ever. Of course, it has to do with moving. We got the house in Morgan Hill, but through a series of unfortunate events, we no longer have the finances to pay first months rent and deposit. Heartbroken, I called and left them a message today saying we want the house, but need a week to figure out our finances and everything. They will most likely rent it out to someone else.

Then, the fact that we were possibly moving home brought up the fact that we were no longer pursuing the ministry as fervently as we once were. We began to pray and discuss what we thought God wanted, and we got counsel from our pastor, parents, and friends. Which led to us making a few calls to different pastor's hiring. Now we suddenly have a few options, [maybe]. What was a simple discussion to move home so I can be near family when Davey travels, brought on a real soul searching for our future. I still really want to move home and specifically into that house, but I HAVE TO TRUST GOD.

We prayed for God's will and that He would provide for us if He wanted us to move. He didn't provide, at least not yet. It's put on hold for right now, and seems God is working and I am an anxious mess.

Davey says I have these manias. When I want something, I find a way to get it. I just do. Ok fine, just say it, I'm a brat. I figure a logical way to get it. Take my bike for example. I wanted it, didn't care about getting fitted, it said it was the right size, so I got it. I thanked God for it, but when I realized it was the wrong size I was upset. I prayed for the bike but didn't listen to Him.

I have trouble being patient. I just can't wait. It's horrible. I am now aware of these manias and I really didn't think this Morgan Hill thing was one. I thought God was really in it, and maybe He is. I just need to depend on Him and not always rush and make things happen on my own and in my own timing.

I've been crying and frustrated for a few days now. I really had hoped to live close to my Mom and other family for a little while before we moved and got hired by a ministry. BUT I know, I want HIS WILL. He is all knowing. He holds the best future for us, one He picked perfect, specifically for us. And all the trials and heart aches are in His master plan.

I am hopeful, that He is working and we will be where He wants us very soon. Even if that's right here. Paul said in Philippians 4:11 "...for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content." Wow. What a convicting verse that is for me.

Tuesday I was so stressed and busy I didn't work out. Horrible. I know. Yesterday I was a mess, I went to the gym and really, took it out on the treadmill. I ran 7 miles. I was angry so I ran fast and hard and sweat buckets. I took relaxing walk breaks once in a while and breathed deep. It was a fun, and a great stress reliever.

Today I did Yoga and Cycle. Thankful that through all the stress I've managed to stay on track with my calories. I peaked on the scale and I am 189.6 [lowest by .2] and hoping for a little lower on Saturday. Thanks for reading all my complaints. ....... Again.

Love,
The Maniac